Musing from a contemplative mind....

This Sunday my wife and I helped a friend of ours at our church who had not seen her children for several months.  She mentioned she was not able to see her kids because, even though she had a court order, her husband prevented her from visiting her children.  So we escorted her on the property.  I know the husband and we have a rapport so I thought everything was cool. 

Her children acted at first as if they needed to inform the father of the intrusion and then they seemed glad to see their mom.  We were greeted by a strong, you need to leave from her husband.  I responded by saying, she has a court order that says she has a legal right to be here.  His brother, whom I have never met, starts walking toward my wife and gets within about six inches of her.  I pushed her behind me and slipped in front of her and told him to get away from my wife, NOW.  He said, if we don't leave he will call the cops, I said, go ahead, we will be right here.  Then, he got right in my face and his nose was within centimeters of mine as he yelled, you have one second before I take you down.  I felt my right hand clench up and I my head I heard this voice SCREAMING, hit him.  HIT HIM.  I did not make a move, I stood my ground and took his verbal abuse and his verbal threats, especially since moved toward my wife in a threatening way.   Then I thought of Jesus, he was insulted, beaten, punched and had his hair pulled from his face.  I had someone scream, that I was a p__sy and threatened to do bodily harm and for that, I was ready to drop this guy?

I am sure the papers would have had a field day, local minister beats up resident (and I would have) and ends up in jail.  I found out how hard it is to be a man by leaving your fists at your side, because anyone can fight, but not everyone can control their spirit.  By the grace of God, I did....

...yesterday

Faith without wisdom is just an excuse to be crazy and blame it on God.

As a brand new (you can smell the new parent smell on my wife and I) parent and someone who worked with adolescents I am becoming more aware that the single biggest reason why people in their teens and 20 somethings remain in this protracted adolescence is because of the single principle that parents fail acknowledge, its is the job of parents to drive foolishness out of their kids, it is not the job of parents to celebrate foolishness in their children. There is a timer that is ticking in each young persons life and somewhere between 14-16 if they have not had this foolishness driven out, they will emerge as young adult fools, which is very harsh. But the definition of a fool is someone who hates discipline and hates the authority that provides the said disciplines. Proverbs says, the person who does not discipline their child hates them. We see this come to fruition as the child is given the assignment of adult by virtue of turning 18. But if they have not been prepared for adulthood they will have all of the legal responsibilities and social expectation and none of the practical application of how to walk as an adult. Its like handing the keys of the car to a 12 year old and saying, go ahead and start errr up, you can figure it out as you go. While there is on the job learning, if a child has only been a child all of their life then the transition to adulthood will be exceptionally difficult and met with emotional resistance. I read recently that the process of childhood was to prepare children to become adults, now the goal of adulthood is to remain a child.

Its great to be a kid, its just not great to remain one.

The month of August has special significance to me.  Fifteen years ago, I married my best friend, six years ago God preserved her life in a car accident (we were in where she fractured her C-1 vertebrae), three years ago we accepted the post as pastors of a Foursquare church in Southern New Hampshire and this Sunday we dedicate our daughter Cynthia whom we adopted a few months ago. 

Yesterday my wife and I were talking, if God doesn't save her life, I probably don't stay in this area so we don't become pastors and then we wouldn't be parents. today.  I don't know what the future holds for us, but as I look back to the past I know it will be exciting, full of twists and turns, some of which will lead us to places we wanted to be, others will take us to places we wish we never had to visit.   All of these places are part of a sovereign plan by His unseen hand.  Looking back its hard to believe that we are here today, but in fact we are right in the center of God's, because of his grace. 

And we are just thankful debtors

I received an 40% off USB Flash drives; 8GB or more, it said in the fine print. I looked through the drives and sure enough, the 8GB and 16GB are within price reach. What does this mean? Well basically, everything that you’ve been storing on your laptop’s hard drive can now be conveniently placed on an electronic stick and toted on your key chain, around your neck or in your pocket. I remember when those small (3.5”) floppies were marketed for their size. Before those, my first hard drive – a 5MB IBM drive – was the size of two large Yellow Pages books put together. By today’s standards, it held only the equivalent of two photographs taken on a nice pocket digital camera. But back then, I never imagined I’d fill up that hard drive. But I did. And later, I filled my 20MB drive. Then came the ads for the Zip Drive, “Store more stuff!” and I did. And along the way, with each subsequent generation of technology, I was relieved that my excesses didn’t have to be jettisoned during the migration to a new computer or new hard drive; rather, I could take along and store them safely in folders buried in folders. And I know I’m not alone in my feelings of relief. Google, Yahoo and Microsoft have all developed search utilities just for this purpose: to find those bits and pieces from our past that we refuse to clean up or throw out. So now today – thank God – we can store more, save more and protect more. We really don’t have to deal with cleaning or clearing up. Wouldn’t life be great if we could do the same with all of our “stuff?” You only get one chance at life. So you better make sure to prioritize and keep the things that are necessary.  You have a chance to clear out your memory and your baggage. It’s a time to really bring life down to the bare essentials. What does it really take to live? You know how the questions go… If you had a fire in your home – what would you take with you? If you were stranded on a desert island, what 10 CD’s would you want there to comfort you? If your hard drive crashed, and you had a chance to recover only 10 files, what would they be?  Before things get bad, slow down, lighten up and live. What are the 10 files that are most important to you? Which relationships move you closer to your humanity? What are the things that you would want to present to God at the final check out?

The last two times I have flown somewhere, I have turned on the news to hear that there was a fatal plane crash.  It reminds us all that life is temporary and that as much as we would like to think we are in control, that one lightening bolt or one winter storm can change our lives forever.  The question for us is when that day happens are we ready to die, or will it come on us when we were thinking I have more time, I will think about God and spirituality later, because right now there its MY TIME.  I guarantee you there were people on that flight whose future was secure in the arms of Jesus and there were people who felt the horrible sting of death with no one to catch them. 

As for my and my house we will serve the Lord in life and when this life ends.

So I have spent the past week living in the past.  Reconnecting with old friends and hearing what the last 10 years has been like for them.  This week I spent time with and old college friend, a friend of my from old church who's life has crashed, some good friends from the same church, I had a chance to speak at the church I youth pastored in, in my 20's, hung out with my folks and then spent a night with our former youth who are now all in their 20's trying for figure out what life is for them.  These five kids lost their mom to cancer, found out their dad cheated on their mom and ostensibly the whole family, had their father marry this woman without telling them and then essentially disowned them all.  It was a heart ache to hear.  But somewhere in midst of this, they developed this new family where the eldest girl is the mom and the oldest boy is the father figure for the rest this new family.  I would like to tell you that they remained in relationship with God's people, but they didn't.  What I discovered was they did not turn their back on God.  I said to one of them, I had cancer when I was 17 and I think it was preferable to all that you guys went throught.  What do you say to people who have not connected with for 8 years.  Its not a time to fix anything, or find out if they are going to church.  I think it was a time to let them know that we stil care, that God still cares and that they still matter to us. 

I think this week it reaffirmed that relationships are not disposable and relationships never die...

until we do.